Peter De Vries – Friendship Quotes – a large collection of famous and inspirational quotes

Humor Quotes

Posted on January 18, 2012 by

I have a fine sense of the ridiculous, but no sense of humor. – Edward Albee

I think the next best thing to solving a problem is finding some humor in it. – Frank Howard Clark

If I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide. – Mohandas Gandhi

If you could choose one characteristic that would get you through life, choose a sense of humor. – Jennifer Jones

Imagination was given to man to compensate him for what he is not; a sense of humor to console him for what he is. – Francis Bacon

In conversation, humor is worth more than wit and easiness more than knowledge. – George Herbert

Like a welcome summer rain, humor may suddenly cleanse and cool the earth, the air and you. – Langston Hughes

My computer beat me at checkers, but I sure beat it at kickboxing. – Emo Philips

Nothing is so galling to a people not broken in from the birth as a paternal, or in other words a meddling government, a government which tells them what to read and say and eat and drink and wear. – Thomas W. Higginson

One doesn’t have a sense of humor. It has you. – Larry Gelbart

Puns are a form of humor with words. – Guillermo Cabrera Infante

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with. – W. C. Fields

The more I live, the more I think that humor is the saving sense. – Jacob August Riis

The satirist shoots to kill while the humorist brings his prey back alive and eventually releases him again for another chance. – Peter De Vries

The secret to humor is surprise. – Aristotle

There is hope for the future because God has a sense of humor and we are funny to God. – Bill Cosby

There is no defense against adverse fortune which is so effectual as an habitual sense of humor. – Thomas W. Higginson

There seems to be no lengths to which humorless people will not go to analyze humor. It seems to worry them. – Robert Benchley

This I conceive to be the chemical function of humor: to change the character of our thought. – Lin Yutang

What a strange world this would be if we all had the same sense of humor. – Bern Williams

Funny Quotes About Parents

Posted on August 13, 2011 by

“Parents are not interested in justice, they’re interested in peace and quiet.” – Bill Cosby

“There are two things that a child will share willingly – communicable diseases and its mother’s age.” – Benjamin Spock

“I don’t think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib.” – Woody Allen

“Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.” – Bill Cosby

“Parents are the bones on which children cut their teeth.” – Peter Ustinov

“Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath, and hope we’ve set aside enough money to pay for our kids’ therapy.” – Michelle Pfeiffer

“Think of stretch marks as pregnancy service stripes.” – Joyce Armor

“Little League baseball is a very good thing because it keeps the parents off the streets.” – Yogi Berra

“The most loving parents and relatives commit murder with smiles on their faces. They force us to destroy the person we really are: a subtle kind of murder.” – Jim Morrison

“I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.” – Rodney Dangerfield

“If your parents never had children, chances are you won’t, either.” – Dick Cavett

“That’s sort of a cliché about parents. We all believe that our children are the most beautiful children in the world. But the thing is, what no one really talks about is the fact that we all really believe it.” – Heather Armstrong

“My father hated radio and could not wait for television to be invented so he could hate that too.” – Peter De Vries

“Somewhere it is written that parents who are critical of other people’s children and publicly admit they can do better is asking for it.” – Erma Bombeck

“My husband and I have decided to start a family while my parents are still young enough to look after them.” – Rita Rudner

“Call me Jonah. My parents did, or nearly did. They called me John.” – Kurt Vonnegut

“It is paradoxical that many educators and parents still differentiate between a time for learning and a time for play without seeing the vital connection between them.” – Leo Buscaglia

“Parents wonder why the streams are bitter, when they themselves have poisoned the fountain.” – John Locke

“My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.” – Mark Twain

“Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.” – Ogden Nash

“My parents are my backbone. Still are. They’re the only group that will support you if you score zero or you score 40.” – Kobe Bryant

“I believe that we parents must encourage our children to become educated, so they can get into a good college that we cannot afford.” – Dave Barry

“Tyranny or slavery, born of selfishness, are the two educational methods of parents; all gradations of tyranny or slavery.” – Franz Kafka

“The best part about being friends with your parents is that no matter what you do, they have to keep loving you.” – Natalie Portman