Anger
Anger is a felling that makes your mouth work faster than your mind. – Evan Esar
Tag: Evan Esar
Success Quotes
– “We are all motivated by a keen desire for praise, and the better a man is, the more he is inspired to glory.” – Cicero
– “Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” – Euripides
– “They can because they think they can.” – Virgil
– “Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude.” – Thomas Jefferson
– “Keep steadily before you the fact that all true success depends at last upon yourself.” – Theodore T. Hunger
– “Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out.” – Robert Collier
– “The thing always happens that you really believe in; and the belief in a thing makes it happen.” – Frank Loyd Wright
– “A failure is a man who has blundered, but is not able to cash in on the experience.” – Elbert Hubbard
– “There is only one success–to be able to spend your life in your own way.” – Christopher Morley
– “The secret of success is to know something nobody else knows.” – Aristotle Onassis
– “The greatest results in life are usually attained by simple means and the exercise of ordinary qualities. These may for the most part be summed in these two: common-sense and perseverance.” – Owen Feltham
– “Failures do what is tension relieving, while winners do what is goal achieving.” – Dennis Waitley
– “The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack in will.” – Vince Lombardi
– “I cannot give you the formula for success, but I can give you the formula for failure–which is: Try to please everybody.” – Herbert Bayard Swope
– “Success does not consist in never making blunders, but in never making the same one a second time.” – Josh Billings
– “The secret of success in life is for a man to be ready for his opportunity when it comes.” – Earl of Beaconsfield
– “Success is the good fortune that comes from aspiration, desperation, perspiration and inspiration.” – Evan Esar
– “The surest way not to fail is to determine to succeed.” – Richard Brinsley Sheridan
– “If you wish success in life, make perseverance your bosom friend, experience your wise counselor, caution your elder brother, and hope your guardian genius.” – Jospeph Addison
– “Impatience never commanded success.” – Edwin H. Chapin
– “The talent of success is nothing more than doing what you can do, well.” – Henry W. Longfellow
– “To climb steep hills requires a slow pace at first.” – Shakespeare
– “Try not to become a man of success but a man of value.” – Albert Einstein
– “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no use being a damn fool about it.” – W.C. Fields
Funny Family Quotes
“Some family trees bear an enormous crop of nuts.” – Wayne H.
“The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy.” – Sam Levenson
“Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.” – George Burns
“Family: A social unit where the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space.” – Evan Esar
“Families are like fudge – mostly sweet with a few nuts.” – Anonymous
“Parents are not interested in justice, they’re interested in peace and quiet.” – Bill Cosby
“My husband and I have decided to start a family while my parents are still young enough to look after them.” – Rita Rudner
“Having a two-year-old is like having a blender that you don’t have the top for.” – Jerry Seinfeld
“There are two things in life for which we are never truly prepared: Twins.” – Josh Billings
“Wealth is any income that is at least one hundred dollars a year more than the income of one’s wife’s sister’s husband.” – HL Mencken
“A father is someone who carries pictures in his wallet where his money used to be.” – Anonymous
“Santa Claus has the right idea. Only visit people once a year.” – Victor Borge
“My mother didn’t breast feed me. She said she just liked me as a friend.” – Rodney Dangerfield
“I’m going home next week. It’s a kind of energency – my parents are coming here.” – Rita Rudner
“I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me.” – Rodney Dangerfield
“Teenagers, are you tired of being harassed by your stupid parents? Act now. Move out, get a job, and pay your own bills – while you still know everything.” – John Hinde
“Friends are God’s apology for relations.” – Hugh Kingsmill
Gas Prices Quotes
– “Finland has produced so many brilliant distance runners because back home it costs $2.50 a gallon for gas.” – Esa Tikkannen, 1979
– “I am having an out of money experience.” – Unknown
– “The use of solar energy has not been opened up because the oil industry does not own the sun.” – Ralph Nader
– “The bicycle is the most efficient machine ever created: Converting calories into gas, a bicycle gets the equivalent of three thousand miles per gallon.” – Bill Strickland
– “Business is the art of extracting money from another man’s pocket without resorting to violence.” – Max Amsterdam
– “Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.” – Steven Wright
– “I figured out Karl Rove’s political strategy – make gas so expensive, no Democrats can afford to go to the polls.” – John Kerry
– “Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.” – George Carlin
– “It’s better to have beer in hand than gas in tank.” – Unknown
– “Even if gas prices fall, consumers will continue to be gouged at the pump. The only thing that we can be sure rises faster that the price of gasoline is the skyrocketing profits of oil companies.” – R. Owens
– “A pedestrian is someone who thought there were a couple of gallons left in the tank.” – Unknown
– “If inflation continues to soar, you’re going to have to work like a dog just to live like one.” – George Gobel
– “Man is the animal that intends to shoot himself out into interplanetary space, after having given up on the problem of an efficient way to get himself five miles to work and back each day.” – Bill Vaughan
– “Walking isn’t a lost art – one must, by some means, get to the garage.” – Evan Esar
– “The shortest distance between two points is under construction.” – Noelie Altito
– “Restore human legs as a means of travel. Pedestrians rely on food for fuel and need no special parking facilities.” – Lewis Mumford
– “In the old days a man who saved money was a miser; nowadays he’s a wonder.” – Unknown