Friendship Quotes – a large collection of famous and inspirational quotes

Menu

Tag: Irish Proverb

April Fool’s Day Quotes

Posted on by

April Fool’s Day is here. Let’s celebrate it with some useful April Fool’s Day Quotes.

April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four. ~Mark Twain, Pudd’nhead Wilson, 1894

April fool, n. The March fool with another month added to his folly. ~Ambrose Bierce, The Devil’s Dictionary

Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me. ~Chinese Proverb

Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee,
And I’ll forgive Thy great big one on me. ~Robert Frost, “Cluster of Faith,” 1962

He who is born a fool is never cured. ~Proverb

Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed. ~Mark Twain

If every fool wore a crown, we should all be kings. ~Welsh Proverb

I hope life isn’t a big joke, because I don’t get it. ~Jack Handey

We’re fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance. ~Japanese Proverb

You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time. ~Abraham Lincoln

Even the gods love jokes. ~Plato

The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected. ~Will Rogers

A man always blames the woman who fools him. In the same way he blames the door he walks into in the dark. ~Henry Louis Mencken

A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools. ~Douglas Adams

It is the ability to take a joke, not make one, that proves you have a sense of humor. ~Max Eastman

Don’t give cherries to pigs or advice to fools. ~Irish Proverb

A sense of humor is the ability to understand a joke-and that the joke is oneself. ~Clifton Paul Fadiman

It is better to weep with wise men than to laugh with fools. ~Spanish Proverb

I have great faith in fools – self-confidence, my friends call it. ~Edgar Allan Poe

The aim of a joke is not to degrade the human being, but to remind him that he is already degraded. ~George Orwell

Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke? ~Rita Rudner

Suppose the world were only one of God’s jokes, would you work any the less to make it a good joke instead of a bad one? ~George Bernard Shaw

Real friends are those who, when you feel you’ve made a fool of yourself, don’t feel you’ve done a permanent job. ~Author Unknown

One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. “Oh, no,” I said. “Disneyland burned down.” He cried and cried, but I think that deep down, he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late. ~Jack Handey

Mother Quotes

Posted on by

“If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?” ~Milton Berle

“A mother’s arms are made of tenderness and children sleep soundly in them.” ~Victor Hugo

“Mother is the name for God in the lips and hearts of little children.” ~William Makepeace Thackeray

“Youth fades; love droops; the leaves of friendship fall; A mother’s secret hope outlives them all.” ~Oliver Wendell Holmes

“A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest.’ ~Irish Proverb

“God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers.” ~Rudyard Kipling

“Mothers are fonder than fathers of their children because they are more certain they are their own.” ~Aristotle

“A mother’s love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity, it dares all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path.” ~Agatha Christie

“No one in the world can take the place of your mother. Right or wrong, from her viewpoint you are always right. She may scold you for little things, but never for the big ones.” ~Harry Truman

“A boy’s best friend is his mother.” ~Joseph Stefano

“Children are the anchors that hold a mother to life.” ~Sophocles

“Who ran to help me when I fell, and would some pretty story tell, or kiss the place to make it well? My mother.” ~Ann Taylor

“A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials heavy and sudden, fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends who rejoice with us in our sunshine desert us; when trouble thickens around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts.” ~Washington Irving

If you… #2

Posted on by

– “If you can’t dance, don’t blame the dance floor.”

– “If you can’t laugh at yourself, you may be missing the joke of the century.”

– “If you can’t say something nice, become a reporter.”

– “If you can’t sleep, don’t count sheep. Talk to the Shepherd.”

– “If you can’t sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there worrying. It’s the worry that gets you, not the lack of sleep.” – Dale Carnegie

– “If you could kick the person responsible for most of your troubles in the backside, you wouldn’t be able to sit down for two weeks.”

– “If you decide not to choose then you’ve already made the wrong choice!”

– “If you depend on others to make you happy, you will be endlessly disappointed.”

– “If you don’t do it, you’ll never know what would have happened if you had done it.” – Ashleigh Brilliant

– “If you don’t have time to do it right, you must have time to do it over.”

– “If you don’t know where you are going, every road will get you nowhere.” – Henry Kissinger

– “If you don’t know where you’re going how do you expect to get there.”

– “If you don’t like something about yourself, change it. If you can’t change it, accept it.” – Ted Shackelford

– “If you don’t like the road you’re walking, pave another one.” – Dolly Parton

– “If you don’t like the way you were born, try being born again.”

– “If you don’t love, you can’t live; if you don’t live, you can’t love.” – Jason Benson

– “If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything.”

– “If you don’t want your children to hear what you’re saying, pretend you’re speaking directly to them.”

– “If you do your best, don’t mind the rest.” – Irish Proverb

– “If you drop a white glove into the mud, the glove will get muddy but the mud will never get glovey.”

– “If you ever need a helping hand, there is one at the end of your arm.”

– “If you fail to prepare, you prepare to fail.”

– “If you find a four-leaf clover, it means you have entirely too much time on your hands.”

– “If you follow in others footsteps you will never leave yours behind.”

– “If you gave me something I need more than you do, you’ve given me a gift; If you’ve given me something you need more than I do, you’ve gifted me with love.”

– “If you get to thinkin’ you’re a person of some influence, try orderin’ somebody else’s dog around.”

– “If you give 100%, God will make up the difference!”

– “If you go out looking for friends, you’re going to find they are very scarce. If you go out to be a friend, you’ll find them everywhere.” – Zig Zigler

– “If you have an apple and I have an apple and we exchange these apples then you and I will still each have one apple.”

– “But if you have an idea and I have an idea and we exchange these ideas, then each of us will have two ideas.” – George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)

– “If you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof overhead, and a place to sleep…you are richer than 75% of this world.”

– “If you have money in the bank, in your wallet, and spare change in a dish someplace…you are among the top 8% of the world’s wealthy.”

– “If you have much, give of your wealth; if you have little, give of your heart.” – Arab proverb

– “If you have never been hated by your child, you have never been a parent.” – Bette Davis

– “If you haven’t all the things that you want, be thankful for all the things that you don’t have that you didn’t want.”

– “If you haven’t much education you must use your brain.”

Laugh Quotes

Posted on by

– “I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.” – Woody Allen

– “At the height of laughter, the universe is flung into a kaleidoscope of new possibilities. ” – Jean Houston

– “Even if there is nothing to laugh about, laugh on credit.” – Unknown

– “Mirth is God’s medicine. Everybody ought to bathe in it.” – Henry Ward Beecher

– “Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis.” – Jack Handey, “Deep Thoughts”, Saturday Night Live

– “The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.” – Unknown

– “Laughter is an instant vacation.” – Milton Berle

– “What monstrous absurdities and paradoxes have resisted whole batteries of serious arguments, and then crumbled swiftly into dust before the ringing death-knell of a laugh!” – Agnes Repplier

– “So many tangles in life are ultimately hopeless that we have no appropriate sword other than laughter.” – Gordon W. Allport

– “Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.” – Victor Borge

– “What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul.” – Yiddish Proverb

– “When people are laughing, they’re generally not killing each other.” – Alan Alda

– “Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion. I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward.” – Kurt Vonnegut

– “A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor’s book.” – Irish Proverb

– “Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with it and then move on.” – Bob Newhart

– “A hearty laugh gives one a dry cleaning, while a good cry is a wet wash.” – Puzant Kevork Thomajan

– “There can never be enough said of the virtues, dangers, the power of a shared laugh.” – Françoise Sagan

– “I’ve always thought that a big laugh is a really loud noise from the soul saying, «Ain’t that the truth.»” – Quincy Jones

– “Laughter is the corrective force which prevents us from becoming cranks.” – Henri Bergson

– “Dogs laugh, but they laugh with their tails. What puts man in a higher state of evolution is that he has got his laugh on the right end.” – Max Eastman

– “A man isn’t poor if he can still laugh.” – Raymond Hitchcock

– “Maturity is a bitter disappointment for which no remedy exists, unless laughter can be said to remedy anything.” – Kurt Vonnegut

– “Remember, men need laughter sometimes more than food.” – Anna Fellows Johnston

– “No man who has once heartily and wholly laughed can be altogether irreclaimably bad.” – Thomas Carlyle, Sartor Resartus, Book I, chapter 4

– “You can’t deny laughter; when it comes, it plops down in your favorite chair and stays as long as it wants.” – Stephen King, Hearts in Atlantis

– “With the fearful strain that is on me night and day, if I did not laugh I should die.” – Abraham Lincoln

– “Whoever said “laughter is the best medicine” never had gonorrhea.” – Kat Likkel and John Hoberg, My Name Is Earl, “Robbed a Stoner Blind”, original airdate 16 November 2006

– “Man, when you lose your laugh you lose your footing.” – Ken Kesey