Friendship Quotes – a large collection of famous and inspirational quotes

Menu

Tag: Stephen Colbert

Inspirational Quotes

The sea was angry that day, my friends, like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli. — George Kostanza

Almost all the other fellows do not look from the facts to the theory but from the theory to the facts; they cannot get out of the network of already accepted concepts; instead, comically, they only wriggle about inside. — Albert Einstein (in a letter to Erwin Schrödinger, August 8, 1935)

Voting in a democracy makes you feel powerful, much as playing the lottery makes you feel rich. — Mencius Moldbug

Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn’t go away. — Philip K. Dick

If you aren’t fired with enthusiasm, you’ll be fired with enthusiasm. — Vince Lombardi (US football coach, 1913-1970)

If you don’t have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over? — John Wooden

If I had six hours to chop down a tree, I’d spent the first four sharpening the axe. — Abraham Lincoln

People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing — that’s why we recommend it daily. — Zig Ziglar

Fools ignore complexity. Pragmatists suffer it. Geniuses remove it. — Alan Perlis

Whenever you find you are on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect. — Mark Twain

Inspirational QuotesI’ll go anywhere as long as it’s forward. — David Livingstone

In the depths of winter, I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer. — Albert Camus

I don’t like work–no man does–but I like what is in the work,–the chance to find yourself. Your own reality–for yourself, not for others–what no other man can ever know. They can only see the mere show, and never can tell what it really means. — Joseph Conrad

The language of friendship is not words, but meanings. — Henry David Thoreau

Man is surely mad. He cannot make a worm; yet he makes Gods by the dozen. — Michel de Montaigne

Life is 10% what happens to me, and 90% how I react to it. — John Maxwell

You wouldn’t worry so much about what other people think if you knew how seldom they do. — Minutes from the Association of Iron and Steel Engineers, 1961

Socialism never took root in America because the poor see themselves not as an exploited proletariat but as temporarily embarrassed millionaires. — John Steinbeck

Jack of all trades, master of none, though oftentimes better than master of one. — Geffray Mynshul (Essays and Characters of a Prison, 1612)

Where ignorance is bliss, ’tis folly to be wise. — Thomas Gray (Ode on a Distant Prospect of Eton College, 1742)

There’s an old saying about those who forget history. I don’t remember it, but it’s good. — Stephen Colbert

Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. — George Bernard Shaw

It is here that we encounter the central theme of existentialism: to live is to suffer, to survive is to find meaning in the suffering. — Victor Frankl

The wisest men follow their own direction. — Euripides

Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world. — The Buddha

If you speak the truth, have a foot in the stirrup. — Turkish Proverb

I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use. — Galileo Galilei

Famous Quotes

– “I have no use for people who throw their weight around as celebrities, or for those who fawn over you just because you are famous.” – Walt Disney

– “In the future everyone will be famous for 15 minutes.” – Andy Warhol

– “My idea of a good picture is one that’s in focus and of a famous person.” – Andy Warhol

– “I’m bored with that line. I never use it anymore. My new line is «In 15 minutes everybody will be famous.»” – Andy Warhol

– “I didn’t know what to expect from a famous movie star; maybe that he’d be sort of stuck-up, you know. But not Gary Cooper. He horsed around so much… that I had a hard time painting him.” – Norman Rockwell

– “Did you ever stop to think why cops are always famous for being dumb? Simple. Because they don’t have to be anything else.” – Orson Welles

– “Public misbehavior by the famous is a powerful teaching tool.” – Bill O’Reilly

– “What a heavy burden is a name that has become too famous.” – Voltaire

– “The first pork-barrel bill that crosses my desk, I’m going to veto it and make the authors of those pork-barrel items famous all over America.” – John McCain

– “Know the names of past and current artists who are most famous for playing their instruments.” – Marilyn vos Savant

– “A very quiet and tasteful way to be famous is to have a famous relative. Then you can not only be nothing, you can do nothing too.” – P. J. O’Rourke

– “When I started out, I didn’t have any desire to be an actress or to learn how to act. I just wanted to be famous.” – Katharine Hepburn

– “I just think Rosa Parks was overrated. Last time I checked, she got famous for breaking the law.” – Stephen Colbert

– “When I was going for my graduate degree, I decided I was going to make a feature film as my thesis. That’s what I was famous for-that I had my thesis film be a feature film, which was You’re a Big Boy Now.” – Francis Ford Coppola

– “We all want to be famous people, and the moment we want to be something we are no longer free.” – Jiddu Krishnamurti

– “Martyrdom: The only way a man can become famous without ability.” – George Bernard Shaw

– “People hate me because I am a multifaceted, talented, wealthy, internationally famous genius.” – Jerry Lewis

– “Any idiot can get laid when they’re famous. That’s easy. It’s getting laid when you’re not famous that takes some talent.” – Kevin Bacon

– “Nothing in life prepares you to be famous.” – Jeff Foxworthy

Stephen Colbert Quotes

“Don’t be afraid to be a fool. Remember, you cannot be both young and wise. Young people who pretend to be wise to the ways of the world are mostly just cynics. Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it is the farthest thing from it. Because cynics don’t learn anything. Because cynicism is a self-imposed blindness, a rejection of the world because we are afraid it will hurt us or disappoint us. Cynics always say no. But saying yes begins things. Saying yes is how things grow. Saying yes leads to knowledge. “Yes” is for young people. So for as long as you have the strength to, say yes.”

“If our Founding Fathers wanted us to care about the rest of the world, they wouldn’t have declared their independence from it.”

“Agnostics are just atheists without balls.”

“If I had a dime for everytime that I was wrong, I’d be broke.”

“Tomorrow you’re all going to wake up in a brave new world, a world where the Constitution gets trampled by an army of terrorist clones, created in a stem-cell research lab run by homosexual doctors who sterilize their instruments over burning American flags. Where tax-and-spend Democrats take all your hard-earned money and use it to buy electric cars for National Public Radio, and teach evolution to illegal immigrants. Oh, and everybody’s high!”

“Equations are the devil’s sentences.”

“Look, PETA! If God hadn’t wanted us to eat animals, he wouldn’t have made them so darn tasty!”

“It is a well know fact that reality has liberal bias”

“All Dogs Go To Heaven? Sorry, kids. It’s only the dogs who’ve accepted Christ.”

“There’s an old saying about those who forget history. I don’t remember it, but it’s good.”

“Atheism, a religion dedicated to its own sense of smug superiority.”

“I’m the frosting on America’s cake, and tonight I’m willing to let you lick the bowl.”

“Here’s an easy way to figure out if you’re in a cult:If you’re wondering whether you’re in a cult, the answer is yes.”

“Baby carrots are making me gay.”

“They say the only people who tell the truth are drunkards and children. Guess which one I am.”

“Wikipedia is the first place I go when I’m looking for knowledge… or when I want to create some.”

“I may not agree with what you have to say but I will fight you to the death for the right to fight you to the death.”

“A father has to be a provider, a teacher, a role model, but most importantly, a distant authority figure who can never be pleased. Otherwise, how will children ever understand the concept of God?”

“You said in your book that at the end of the day, every politician is human. What about during the day?”

“The summer movies are coming out. My advice: just stay home and burn a good book.”

Internet Quotes

– “Nowadays, anyone who cannot speak English and is incapable of using the Internet is regarded as backward.” – Prince Alwaleed Bin Talal Alsaud

– “If you look at the top 20 companies of the world, 19 of them are still brick-and-mortar companies. I have nothing against tech companies. What I am saying is that if you have a car manufacturer or an oil and gas manufacturer, you won’t get the supply over the Net.” – Anil Ambani

– “Some say Google is God. Others say Google is Satan. But if they think Google is too powerful, remember that with search engines unlike other companies, all it takes is a single click to go to another search engine.” – Sergey Brin

– “It’s important for us to explain to our nation that life is important. It’s not only life of babies, but it’s life of children living in, you know, the dark dungeons of the Internet.” – George Bushism

– “The Internet is based on a layered, end-to-end model that allows people at each level of the network to innovate free of any central control. By placing intelligence at the edges rather than control in the middle of the network, the Internet has created a platform for innovation.” – Vinton Cerf

– “They say a year in the Internet business is like a dog year.. equivalent to seven years in a regular person’s life. In other words, it’s evolving fast and faster.” – Vinton Cerf

– “Science fiction does not remain fiction for long. And certainly not on the Internet.” – Vinton Cerf

– “The remarkable social impact and economic success of the Internet is in many ways directly attributable to the architectural characteristics that were part of its design. The Internet was designed with no gatekeepers over new content or services.” – Vinton Cerf

– “I must confess that I’ve never trusted the Web. I’ve always seen it as a coward’s tool. Where does it live? How do you hold it personally responsible? Can you put a distributed network of fiber-optic cable “on notice”? And is it male or female? In other words, can I challenge it to a fight?” – Stephen Colbert

– “I think it’s a good thing that there are bloggers out there watching very closely and holding people accountable. Everyone in the news should be able to hold up to that kind of scrutiny. I’m for as much transparency in the newsgathering process as possible.” – Anderson Cooper

– “There are managers so preoccupied with their e-mail messages that they never look up from their screens to see what’s happening in the nondigital world.” – Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi

– “The new information technology, Internet and e-mail, have practically eliminated the physical costs of communications.” – Peter Drucker

– “Thousands of people were producing new Web sites every day. We were just trying to take all that stuff and organize it to make it useful.” – David Filo

– “We’re not in this for the fast money. Really, what we want is to be part of this industry.” – David Filo

– “We started Yahoo in about April 1994. It started out as a way for us to keep track of things that we were interested in.” – David Filo

– “First of all we had very few users. We might have had a hundred accesses a day. So there was really no demand from the users to add their own links. Things changed over time though as our access rates doubled every month. Through word of mouth on the Net more and more people began using it.” – David Filo

– “The Net as a whole is not that reliable, so our blips in service don’t cause major problems. However, we are certainly working on improving our own reliability as well as those sites that we depend on.” – David Filo

– “The most important ways in which I think the Internet will affect the big issue is that it will make it more difficult for government to collect taxes.” – Milton Friedman

– “Like almost everyone who uses e-mail, I receive a ton of spam every day. Much of it offers to help me get out of debt or get rich quick. It would be funny if it weren’t so exciting.” – Bill Gates

– “Information technology and business are becoming inextricably interwoven. I don’t think anybody can talk meaningfully about one without the talking about the other.” – Bill Gates

– “I think it’s fair to say that personal computers have become the most empowering tool we’ve ever created. They’re tools of communication, they’re tools of creativity, and they can be shaped by their user.” – Bill Gates

– “The Internet will help achieve “friction free capitalism” by putting buyer and seller in direct contact and providing more information to both about each other.” – Bill Gates

– “Paper is no longer a big part of my day. I get 90% of my news online, and when I go to a meeting and want to jot things down, I bring my Tablet PC. It’s fully synchronized with my office machine so I have all the files I need.” – Bill Gates

– “We’re at the point now where the challenge isn’t how to communicate effectively with e-mail, it’s ensuring that you spend your time on the e-mail that matters most.” – Bill Gates

Funny Idiots Quotes

– "If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out?" – Will Rogers

– "Providence protects children and idiots. I know because I have tested it." – Mark Twain

– "In the first place God made idiots; that was for practice; then he made school boards." – Mark Twain

– "We know that the nature of genius is to provide idiots with ideas twenty years later." – Louis Aragon

– "We have no desire to make anybody look like a blithering idiot, but we do love it when they do." – Stephen Colbert

– "There’s nothing more dangerous than a resourceful idiot." – Scott Adams

– "Rogues are preferable to imbeciles because they sometimes take a rest." – Alexandre Dumas