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Other Quotes

Religion and Death Quotes

There are many in the world who are dying for a piece of bread, but there are many more dying for a little love. – Mother Teresa

The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! What’s that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you’re too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating… and you finish off as an orgasm. – George Carlin

Truth, in its struggles for recognition, passes through four distinct stages. First, we say it is damnable, dangerous, disorderly, and will surely disrupt society. Second, we declare it is heretical, infidelic and contrary to the Bible. Third, we say it is really a matter of no importance either one way or the other. Fourth, we aver that we have always upheld it and believed it. – Elbert Hubbard

Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities. – Voltaire

My country is the world, and my religion is to do good. – Thomas Paine

religion and death quotesTime is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils. – Louis Hector Berlioz

Once the game is over, the King and the Pawn go back in the same box. – Italian Proverb

I would love to believe that when I die I will live again, that some thinking, feeling, remembering part of me will continue. But much as I want to believe that, and despite the ancient and worldwide cultural traditions that assert an afterlife, I know of nothing to suggest that it is more than wishful thinking. The world is so exquisite with so much love and moral depth, that there is no reason to deceive ourselves with pretty stories for which there’s little good evidence. Far better it seems to me, in our vulnerability, is to look death in the eye and to be grateful every day for the brief but magnificent opportunity that life provides. – Carl Sagan

Which is it, is man one of God’s blunders or is God one of man’s? – Nietzsche

Religion is what keeps the poor from murdering the rich. – Napoleon

The ink of the scholar is holier than the blood of the martyr. – Prophet Muhammad

I like your Christ; I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ. – Mohandas Gandhi

Lighthouses are more helpful then churches. – Benjamin Franklin

The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one. – George Bernard Shaw

Morality is doing what is right regardless of what you are told. Religion is doing what you are told, regardless of what is right. – Anonymous

It is always darkest just before the day dawneth. – Thomas Fuller, 1650

Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end. – Unknown

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Funny Quotes

Extremely Funny Quotes

Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings. – Unknown

The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. – Robert Bloch

Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils … – Louis Hector Berlioz

It’s true that we don’t know what we’ve got until we lose it, but it’s also true that we don’t know what we’ve been missing until it arrives. – Unknown

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway. – Unknown

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don’t want, drink what you don’t like, and do what you’d rather not. – Mark Twain

I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar. – Unknown

Girls are like phones. We love to be held, talked too but if you press the wrong button you’ll be disconnected! – Unknown

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people. – Unknown

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep — not screaming, like the passengers in his car. – Unknown

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They’re about to announce the lottery numbers. – Homer Simpson

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance? – Unknown

Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn’t find anyone to copy it from. – Unknown

Marriage is give and take. You’d better give it to her or she’ll take it anyway. – Joey Adams

Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else. – Unknown

Ask me no questions, and I’ll tell you no lies. – Oliver Goldsmith

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Other Quotes

Education Quotes

# “I like a teacher who gives you something to take home to think about besides homework.” — Edith Ann, [Lily Tomlin]

# “You teach best what you most need to learn.” — Richard David Bach

# A mind once stretched by a new idea never regains its original dimensions. – Anonymous

# A professor is one who talks in someone else’s sleep. – Anonymous

# A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students. – John Ciardi

# A university professor set an examination question in which he asked what is the difference between ignorance and apathy. The professor had to give an A+ to a student who answered: I don’t know and I don’t care. – Richard Pratt, Pacific Computer Weekly, 20 July 1990

# “Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils.” — (Louis) Hector Berlioz

# Academy: A modern school where football is taught. – Ambrose Bierce (1842-1914) – The Devil’s Dictionary, 1911

# An expert is a man who has made all the mistakes which can be made, in a narrow field. – Niels Bohr (1885-1962)

# Education … has produced a vast population able to read but unable to distinguish what is worth reading. – G. M. Trevelyan

# Education is a method whereby one acquires a higher grade of prejudices. – Laurence J. Peter

# An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less. – Nicholas Murray Butler

# Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance. – Will Durant

# Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school. – Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

# Experience is a good school, but the fees are high. – Heinrich Heine

# Experience is a great advantage. The problem is that when you get the experience, you’re too damned old to do anything about it. – Jimmy Connors

# Experience is not what happens to you. It is what you do with what happens to you. – Aldous Huxley

# “Who dares to teach must never cease to learn.” – John Cotton Dana

# “A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops.” – Henry Brooks Adams

# “What we want is to see the child in pursuit of knowledge, and not knowledge in pursuit of the child.” –George Bernard Shaw

# “Good teachers are those who know how little they know. Bad teachers are those who think they know more than they don’t know.” – R. Verdi

# “Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.”
— Perelman

# “Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world.” – Albert Einstein

# “I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.” – Mark Twain

# “Education is not the answer to the question. Education is the means to the answer to all questions.” – William Allin

# “Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterward.” – Vernon Law

# “I may have said the same thing before… But my explanation, I am sure, will always be different.” – Oscar Wilde

# “Anyone can steer the ship when the sea is calm.” – Publilius Syrus