A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything.
A friend should be a master at guessing and keeping still: you must not want to see everything.
A good writer possesses not only his own spirit but also the spirit of his friends.
A great value of antiquity lies in the fact that its writings are the only ones that modern men still read with exactness.
A pair of powerful spectacles has sometimes sufficed to cure a person in love.
A subject for a great poet would be God’s boredom after the seventh day of creation.
A woman may very well form a friendship with a man, but for this to endure, it must be assisted by a little physical antipathy.
Admiration for a quality or an art can be so strong that it deters us from striving to possess it.
After coming into contact with a religious man I always feel I must wash my hands.
Ah, women. They make the highs higher and the lows more frequent.
All credibility, all good conscience, all evidence of truth come only from the senses.
All things are subject to interpretation whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth.
All truly great thoughts are conceived by walking.
All truth is simple… is that not doubly a lie?
Although the most acute judges of the witches and even the witches themselves, were convinced of the guilt of witchery, the guilt nevertheless was non-existent. It is thus with all guilt.
An artist has no home in Europe except in Paris.
And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.
And we should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once. And we should call every truth false which was not accompanied by at least one laugh.
Anyone who has declared someone else to be an idiot, a bad apple, is annoyed when it turns out in the end that he isn’t.
Live Like You Were Dying
Love Like You’ve Never Been Hurt
Dance Like No One’s Watching
Sing Like No One’s Listening
Laugh Like No One Cares
Because You’ve Only Got One Life To Live
Awesome Guest Post from Veronica which I want to thank.
I’ve managed to post here some great funny quotes from some unknown people, but related to today’s times.
– I wish Google Maps had an “Avoid Ghetto” routing option.
-More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can’t wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that’s not only better, but also more directly involves me.
-Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.
-How are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
-I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.
-Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the “people you may know” feature on Facebook people that I do know, but I deliberately choose not to be friends with?
– LOL has gone from meaning, “laugh out loud” to “I have nothing else to say”.
– I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
– Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron test is absolutely petrifying.
– Whenever someone says “I’m not book smart, but I’m street smart”, all I hear is “I’m not real smart, but I’m imaginary smart”.
– How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod and smile because you still didn’t hear what they said?
– MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
– Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
-Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I’m from, this shouldn’t be
-You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you’ve made up your mind that you just aren’t doing anything productive for the rest of the day.
-I’m always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.
– “Do not machine wash or tumble dry” means I will never wash this ever.
-I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There’s so much pressure. ‘I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren’t watching this. It’s only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?’
-I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Darn!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What’d you do after I didn’t answer? Drop the phone and run away?
– I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
What’s your favorite?
“Laugh as much as possible, always laugh. It’s the sweetest thing one can do for oneself & one’s fellow human beings.” – Maya Angelou
“A good laugh makes any interview, or any conversation, so much better.” – Barbara Walters
“He who laughs, lasts.” – Mary Pettibone Poole
“A good laugh overcomes more difficulties and dissipates more dark clouds than any other one thing.” – Laura Ingalls Wilder
“There is nothing like a gleam of humor to reassure you that a fellow human being is ticking inside a strange face.” – Eva Hoffman
“Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.” – Bill Cosby
“A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It’s jolted by every pebble on the road.” – Henry Ward Beecher
“It is a curious fact that people are never so trivial as when they take themselves seriously.” – Oscar Wilde
“When humor goes, there goes civilization.” – Erma Bombeck
“A sense of humor… is needed armor. Joy in one’s heart and some laughter on one’s lips is a sign that the person down deep has a pretty good grasp of life.” – Hugh Sidey
“A sense of humor is part of the art of leadership, of getting along with people, of getting things done” – Dwight D. Eisenhower
“I think the next best thing to solving a problem is finding some humor in it.” – Frank A. Clark
“No mind is thoroughly well organized that is deficient in a sense of humor.” – Samuel Taylor Coleridge
“A well-developed sense of humor is the pole that adds balance to your steps as you walk the tightrope of life.” – William Arthur Ward
“Humor can alter any situation and help us cope at the very instant we are laughing.” – Allen Klein
“Humor is just another defense against the universe.” – Mel Brooks
“Humor is laughing at what you haven’t got when you ought to have it.” – Langston Hughes
“Humor is perhaps a sense of intellectual perspective: an awareness that some things are really important, others not; and that the two kinds are most oddly jumbled in everyday affairs.” – Christopher Morley
“If you could choose one characteristic that would get you through life, choose a sense of humor.” – Jennifer Jones
“Humor is something that thrives between man’s aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth.” – Victor Borge
“Humor is the affectionate communication of insight.” – Leo Rosten
“Like a welcome summer rain, humor may suddenly cleanse and cool the earth, the air and you.” – Langston Hughes
“Next to power without honor, the most dangerous thing in the world is power without humor.” – Eric Sevareid
“The more I live, the more I think that humor is the saving sense.” – Jacob August Riis