Tag: Will Rogers

Cute Dogs Quotes

Posted on August 23, 2012 by

“I talk to him when I’m lonesome like; and I’m sure he understands. When he looks at me so attentively, and gently licks my hands; then he rubs his nose on my tailored clothes, but I never say naught thereat. For the good Lord knows I can buy more clothes, but never a friend like that.” – W. Dayton Wedgefarth

“If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of the fun out of owning one.” – Andy Rooney

“The great pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself too.” – Samuel Butler

“Dogs laugh, but they laugh with their tails.” – Max Eastman

“If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.” – Will Rogers

“They never talk about themselves but listen to you while you talk about yourself, and keep up an appearance of being interested in the conversation.” – Jerome K. Jerome

“The dog was created specially for children. He is the god of frolic.” – Henry Ward Beecher

“Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog’s face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window.” – Steve Bluestone

“Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.” – Roger Caras

“No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does.” – Christopher Morley

“A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.” – Robert Benchley

“There is no faith which has never yet been broken, except that of a truly faithful dog.” – Konrad Lorenz

“Dogs, the foremost snobs in creation, are quick to notice the difference between a well-clad and a disreputable stranger.” – Albert Payson Terhune

“You think dogs will not be in heaven? I tell you, they will be there long before any of us.” – Robert Louis Stevenson

“To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring – it was peace.” – Milan Kundera

“I named my dog Stay so I can say, “Come here, Stay. Come here, Stay.” – Steven Wright

“Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.” – Robert A. Heinlein

20 Humor Quotes

Posted on July 10, 2012 by

1. If it weren’t for my lawyer, I’d still be in prison. It went a lot faster with two people digging. —Joe Martin

2. Acquaintance, n.: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to. —Ambrose Bierce

3. I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. —Noel Coward

4. The difference between death and taxes is death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets. —Will Rogers

5. You know you’re getting old when you stop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you’re down there. —George Burns

6. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana. —Groucho Marx

7. Those are my principles. If you don’t like them I have others.—Groucho Marx

8. Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. —Sam Levenson

9. Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum sonatur. —Unknown Author

10. The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found. —Calvin Trillin

11. The tooth fairy teaches children that they can sell body parts for money. —David Richerby

12. My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don’t really know me. —Garry Shandling

13. I don’t deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don’t deserve that either. —Jack Benny

14. I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific. —Lily Tomlin

15. If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets. —Mel Brooks

16. If I only had a little humility, I’d be perfect. —Ted Turner

17. When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. —Henny Youngman

18. The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made. —Groucho Marx

19. Hofstadter’s Law: It always takes longer than you expect, even when you take into account Hofstadter’s Law. —Douglas Hofstadter

20. Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance, or a stranger. —Franklin P. Jones

50 Best Inspirational Quotes

Posted on January 10, 2012January 10, 2012 by

1. “Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.” – Albert Einstein

2. “Act now. There is never any time but now, and there never will be any time but now.” – Wallace Wattles

3. “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” – Aristotle

4. “The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering the attitudes of his mind.” – William James

5. “It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change.” – Charles Darwin

6. “There is no passion to be found playing small – in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.” – Nelson Mandela

7. “In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: It goes on.” – Robert Frost

8. “You’ve got to win in your mind before you win in your life.” – John Addison

9. “Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.” – Anais Nin

10. “An ounce of doing things is worth a pound of theorizing.” – Wallace Wattles

11. “The pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” – Winston Churchill

12. “Our ultimate freedom is the right and power to decide how anybody or anything outside ourselves will affect us.” – Stephen Covey

13. “The aim of an argument or discussion should not be victory, but progress.” – Joseph Joubert

14. ”Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.” – Winston Churchill

15. “Don’t wait for a light to appear at the end of the tunnel Stride down there and light the bloody thing yourself.” – Dara Henderson

16. “Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change.” – Jim Rohn

17. “Vision without action is just a dream, action without vision just passes the time, vision with action can change the world” – Nelson Mandela

18. “Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.” – T.S. Eliot

19. “To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.” – Oscar Wilde

20. “Freedom is not the absence of commitments, but the ability to choose yours.” – Paulo Coelho

21. “Conformity is the jailer of freedom and the enemy of growth.” – John F. Kennedy

22. “I am tomorrow, or some future day, what I establish today. I am today what I established yesterday or some previous day.” – James Joyce

23. “I have learned that it’s not WHAT I have in my life but WHO I have in my life that counts.” – Unknown

24. “Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined.” – Henry David Thoreau

25. “If you don’t design your own life plan, chances are you’ll fall into someone else’s plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much.” – Jim Rohn

26. “Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.” – Leonardo da Vinci

27. “Things which matter most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least.” – Goethe

28. “It’s time to start living the life you’ve imagined” – Henry James

29. “And in the end it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.” – Abraham Lincoln

30. “Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t want, to impress people they don’t like.” – Will Rogers

31. “Try not. Do or do not. There is no Try.” – Yoda (Star Wars!)

32. “Every man dies. Not every man really lives.” – William Wallace

33. “The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today.” – Franklin D. Roosevelt

34. “There are no limits on what you can achieve with your life, except the limits you accept in your mind” – Brian Tracy

35.“Don’t be pushed by your problems. Be led by your dreams.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

36. “Either you run the day or the day runs you.” – Jim Rohn

37. “When I thought I couldn’t go on, I forced myself to keep going. My success is based on persistence, not luck.” – Estee Lauder

38. “The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one.” ~ Elbert Hubbard

39. “The difference between school and life? In school, you’re taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you’re given a test that teaches you a lesson.” – Tom Bodett

40. “Action is the foundational key to all success.” – Pablo Picasso

41. “The secret of getting started is breaking your complex, overwhelming tasks into small manageable tasks, and then starting on the first one.” – Mark Twain

42. “There is only one success – to be able to spend your life in your own way.” – Christopher Morley

43. “Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.” – Carl Bard

44. “Nothing important was ever achieved without someone taking a chance.” – H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

45. “I will go anywhere as long as it is forward.” – David Livingston

46. “Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.” – Martin Luther King Jr.

47. “The greater danger for most of us is not that our aim is too high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it.” – Michelangelo

48. “Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.” – Thomas A. Edison

49. “Strive for progress, not perfection.” – Unknown

50. “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than the ones you did. So, throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain

I Love Quotes

Posted on December 4, 2011December 4, 2011 by

“The question is not ‘Is there life after death?’ The question is, ‘Is there life before death?’” — Alan Cohen

“Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.” –Unknown

“All the beautiful sentiments in the world weigh less than a single lovely action.” — James Russell Lowel

“The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.” –Unknown

“Tell your boss what you think of him, and the truth shall set you free.” – Unknown

“This above all; to thine own self be true.” — William Shakespeare

“Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of congress. But I repeat myself.” — Mark Twain

“We are always getting ready to live, but never living” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

“The only time a woman succeeds in changing a man is when he’s a baby.” — Natalie Wood

“I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific.” — Lily Tomlin

“When you invest your time and energy in stuff that drags you down, you die a little bit every day.” – Alan Cohen

“The only reason some people get lost in thought is because it’s unfamiliar territory.” –Paul Fix

“Until you try, you don’t know what you can’t do.” –Henry James

“Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.” –Susan Erz

“Be happy while you are living, for you are a long time dead.” –Scottish Proverb

“If you’re going through Hell, keep going.” –Winston Churchill

“How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.” –Anne Frank

“Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.” –Mark Twain

“To think you know what is best for another person is an industrial-strength ego trip.” –Alan Cohen

“I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.” –Noel Coward

“If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.” — Regina Brett

“If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask?” — Scott Adams

“You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take.” –Wayne Gretzky

“Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.” –Will Rogers

“Doing your best in this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment.” –Oprah Winfrey

Funny Anger Quotes

Posted on October 22, 2011October 22, 2011 by

Let me make your day better with some funny anger quotes selected just for you.

If a small thing has the power to make you angry, does that not indicate something about your size? – Sydney J. Harris

Get mad, then get over it. – Colin Powell

Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die. – Malachy McCourt

Next time you’re mad, try dancing out your anger. – Sweetpea Tyler

Malice drinks one-half of its own poison. – Seneca

When angry, count four; when very angry, swear. – Mark Twain

The worst-tempered people I’ve ever met were people who knew they were wrong. – Wilson Mizner

If you would cure anger, do not feed it. Say to yourself: ‘I used to be angry every day; then every other day; now only every third or fourth day.’ When you reach thirty days offer a sacrifice of thanksgiving to the gods. – Epictetus

Anger is never without a reason, but seldom with a good one. – Albert Einstein

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret. – Ambrose Bierce

I will permit no man to narrow and degrade my soul by making me hate him. – Booker T. Washington

You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist. – Golda Meir

Anger: an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured – Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Expressing anger is a form of public littering. – Willard Gaylin

Keep cool; anger is not an argument. – Daniel Webster

Anger should never be an overnight guest. – Neal A. Maxwell

He is a fool who cannot be angry; – Seneca

Flying off the handle sometimes causes hammers and humans to lose their heads, as well as their effectiveness. – William Arthur Ward

People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing. – Will Rogers

Can you, please, choose your favorite and write it down in the comments section? Thank you!

Relaxing Saturday: Wonderful Relaxation Quotes

Posted on October 1, 2011 by

“Every now and then go away, have a little relaxation, for when you come back to your work your judgment will be surer.” – Leonardo DaVinci

“There is no need to go to India or anywhere else to find peace. You will find that deep place of silence right in your room, your garden or even your bathtub.” – Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

“What’s the use of worrying? It never was worthwhile.” – George Asaf

“Smile, breathe, and go slowly” – Thich Nhat Hanh

“Some of the secret joys of living are not found by rushing from point A to point B, but by inventing some imaginary letters along the way.” – Douglas Pagels

“Stress is not what happens to us. It’s our response to what happens. And response is something we can choose” – Maureen Killoran

“Sometimes it’s important to work for that pot of gold. But other times it’s essential to take time off and to make sure that your most important decision in the day simply consists of choosing which color to slide down on the rainbow.” – Douglas Pagels

“Don’t let your mind bully your body into believing it must carry the burden of its worries.” – Astrid Alauda

“Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of mental illness.” – Richard Carlson

“Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.” – Will Rogers

25 Kickass Inspirational Quotes about Life

Posted on September 30, 2011 by

1. Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself – George Bernard Shaw

2. Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover – Mark Twain

3. Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds you plant – Robert Louis Stevenson

4. We don’t see things the way they are. We see them the way WE are – Talmud

5. I have found that if you love life, life will love you back – Arthur Rubinstein

6. The reason people find it so hard to be happy is that they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be – Marcel Pagnol

7. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step – Lao Tzu

8. Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive and go do it. Because what the world needs is more people who have come alive – Howard Thurman

9. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make, the better – Ralph Waldo Emerson

10. Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t want, to impress people they don’t like – Will Rogers

11. I skate to where the puck is going to be, not where it has been – Wayne Gretzky

12. Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional – Anony-mouse

13. Every man dies. Not every man really lives – William Ross Wallace

14. Life isn’t a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, latte in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming ‘Woohoo WHAT A RIDE’! – Unknown

15. There are two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle – Albert Einstein

16. Uncertainty is the only certainty there is, and knowing how to live with insecurity is the only security – John Allen Paulos

17. You are not in this world to live up to other people’s expectations, nor should you feel the world must live up to yours – F Perl

18. How you do one thing, is how you do everything. Be aware. – Unknown

19. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing – Helen Keller

20. Life is not about kissing ass, it’s about kicking ass! – Unknown

21. The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it – Henry David Thoreau

22. Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life; define yourself – Harvey Fierstein

23. Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are – John Wooden

24. In the end, it’s not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away – Shing Xiong

25. Breathe. It’s just a bad day. Not a bad life – Unknown

Funny Short Quotes

Posted on September 25, 2011 by

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. – Unknown

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep — not screaming, like the passengers in his car. – Will Rogers

A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he’s finished. – Zsa Zsa Gabor

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people. – Unknown

I have met a lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you’re twenty minutes. – Oscar Wilde

A good sermon should be like a woman’s skirt: short enough to rouse the interest, but long enough to cover the essentials. – Unknown

A verbal contract isn’t worth the paper it is written on. – Samual Goldwyn

The road to success is always under construction. – Lily Tomlin

A man’s only as old as the woman he feels. – Groucho Marx

If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button. – Sam Levenson

Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made. – George Burns

Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery. – Unknown

Love is like a booger. You keep picking at it until you get it, then wonder what to do with it. – Unknown

I’m very pleased to be here. Let’s face it, at my age I’m very pleased to be anywhere. – George Burns

Quotes and Observations

Posted on July 23, 2011 by

“If you don’t read the newspaper you are uninformed. If you do read the newspaper, you are misinformed.” ~Mark Twain

Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But then, I repeat myself. ~Mark Twain

I contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle. ~Winston Churchill

A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul. ~George Bernard Shaw

A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money. ~G. Gordon Liddy

Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner. ~James Bovard, (Civil Libertarian, 1994)

Foreign aid might be defined as a transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries. ~Douglas Casey *Bill Clinton’s Classmate at Georgetown University

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. ~P.J. O’Rourke, Civil Libertarian

Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else. ~Frederic Bastiat, French Economist, 1801-1850

Government’s view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it.~Ronald Reagan 1986

I don’t make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. ~Will Rogers

If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it’s free! ~P.J. O’Rourke

In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other. ~Voltaire 1764

Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn’t mean politics won’t take an interest in you! ~Pericles 430 B.C.

No man’s life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session. ~Mark Twain 1866

Talk is cheap except when Congress does it. ~Unknown

The government is like a baby’s alimentary canal, with a happy appetite at one end and no responsibility at the other. ~Ronald Reagan

The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of the blessings. The inherent blessing of socialism is the equal sharing of misery. ~Winston Churchill

The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin. ~Mark Twain

The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools. ~Herbert Spencer English Philosopher 1820-1903

There is no distinctly Native American criminal class …save Congress. ~Mark Twain

What this country needs are more unemployed politicians. ~Edward Langley Artist,1928-1995

A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have. ~Thomas Jefferson

10 Wisdom Quotes about Life

Posted on April 28, 2011 by

“You don’t get to choose how you’re going to die. Or when. You can only decide how you’re going to live. Now.” – Joan Baez

“Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love, to work, to play, and to look up at the stars.” – Henry Van Dyke

“To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.” – Oscar Wilde

“Life resembles a novel more often than novels resemble life.” – George Sand

“Be not afraid of life. Believe that life is worth living, and your belief will help create the fact.” – Henry James

“Men for the sake of getting a living forget to live.” – Margaret Fuller

“Many people die with their music still in them. Why is this so? Too often it is because they are always getting ready to live. Before they know it, time runs out.” – Oliver Wendell Holmes

“Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.” – Will Rogers

“Life is like a sewer. What you get out of it depends on what you put into it.” – Tom Lehrer

“Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.” – Soren Kierkegaard